Hunter’s Widow I am, or just about to be a widow

My dh is a hunter, if you didn’t get that by the title. He’s a bow hunter too, so the season starts early for him, yippee. Don’t get me wrong, we’ve been married for 10 years so I’ve always known he likes hunting and have in fact killed Bambi myself, but this is the first year I’ve ever been a hunting widow, and believe you me, it’ll be my last.

The season started out good, dh would come home early from work, give me a kiss, maybe take a kid or two and off he would go on another excursion. But lately, it’s become obsessive. You see, he’s now hunting elk, a very smart, big-game animal that has so far eluded his bow, and now gun. Here’s the plan though lately, gone by 6 am and not home until the sun sets, which means he’s home around 7:30-8:00 if he’s not chatted with the owner of the land for an hour. Luckily the dumb bastard works for my dad in sales, and is very good at his job so he can come and go whenever he wants.

Unfortunately, the dumb bastard is married to me, someone who refuses to be a hunting widow. He’s neglected everything he could be doing around the house (not that he did much anyway, but what he did was enough to keep me sane). He’s supposed to be taking the computer in as the place we bought it from is offering free virus protection installation with 1 year subscription, ending October 31st. So, guess who’s going to have to take it in tomorrow because he was supposed to do it today.

This is going to stop today, I don’t care if he doesn’t get an elk this year, he’s already spent too much money for it to be a cost savings for us (instead of buying from a grocery store at inflated costs, we shoot it at a lesser cost and it’s healthier). I’m just done, or better yet, he is.

The 100% essay

No, that isn’t the mark I got, it’s an elusive number that I don’t think exists. I truly think that there isn’t any such thing as the 100% essay, in fact I’ve been in school 3 years and know of no one that has received anything utterly close. My thoughts are if you are marking an essay, start with assuming that it automatically receives 100% and take marks off as you find mistakes like mistaken facts, muddled arguments or improper citation. I’m starting to think that professors guess at what mark they think the paper deserves, but haven’t ever given out a 100% mark on anything, with the exception of math, accounting and computers (for which I have received 100% for each one).

Is this really what I want to have my kids strive for? “Hey honey, do your best and remember, you can’t ever get 100%, but go for high eighties and you’ll do fine!”. What a concept to teach us in school that although marks are out of 100, 100 will never be given. Yeah, I’m a bit bitter, mainly because I still hate essays. If only all courses I take could be like the one where I had an awesome prof that would accept proposed alternatives to essays. She accepted my 3500 word story in lieu of a 1500 word essay, and it was on labour unions! By the way, I got a 95% on that story (and yes, there was no evidence that 100 marks were attainable for that one either ).

Psycho kitty

I volunteer at our local humane society. I’m a ‘Kitty Kuddler’ as my title says. I love it, except for the fact that I’m allergic to cats and if I don’t take my anti-histamine meds, I’m a mess (like today ).

Today was the same as any other day that I volunteer. Desperate cats looking for so much attention. Some are kittens abandoned because the mom gave birth again, some surrendered by owners unable to care for them. Once in a while I’ll come across a kitty that just breaks my heart. Today was that day to find a kitty that had no love left for the human touch. I’ll dub her Psycho kitty. Her label said “Grumpy cat” on it, knowing full well what that meant I decided to try and reach her. I opened her door slowly, making sure to not make any sudden moves. Laid a treat down for her as a token of truce. She even let me pet her head lightly. Then all hell broke loose and she went ballistic. I didn’t jump or jolt either because that can make it worse, not only for her, but for my wounds.

I’m wounded now, actual punctures in my skin deep enough to warrant attention. With my allergies in full force my hand swelled and itched. I pity her now, because she was in the adoption area, and I know full well that within a week or two, she’ll be gone, but not adopted. I don’t volunteer in a no-kill facility, it’s not feasible.

I am proud of myself though, I didn’t even want to take any of them home today. Probably because I was sniffling before I was done kuddling the first kitty, but I digress.

I just finished watching The Passion

For the second time I might add.  I watched in the theatre when it first came out.  Was, of course, horrified, and bawled my eyes out.  This time, however, I didn’t cry at all, until I watched one part where He fell the second time and Mary ran to him as a mother would.  I couldn’t imagine it.

Dh wants to let the kids watch it and after seeing it again tonight, I say no way.  It is much too gory for a 5 and 7 y/o to see.  I almost feel as if I’m now accustomed to seeing that much blood and I don’t want my kids to be at that point this early in their lives.  Our society is so visual that I don’t want them immune to the seeing that horror.  I know other parents have let their kids see it, but I’m just not there.  My kids see Jesus on a cross on the wall, but it doesn’t have his face and body smeared with his own flesh and blood.

Nope, this is a movie that will probably be put away, hidden next to the porn …. kidding.

I stunk to high heaven, but my grampa was happy

I love my grandparents, as everyone does, but I seriously strive to spend time with them as I don’t know how long they’ll be with us.

Today I took me, my dh, and my girls out to lunch at the local Legion with my grandparents. It was fantastically yummy food, cheap, and very sociable. Old people love young kids so my 5 & 7 year old got quite a few smiles turned their way. There’s only one glitch. It’s still a smoking area, and they won’t change that any time soon. The city has made a bylaw to ban smoking in all areas where children may be present, but the Legion members fought the ban for their places and won. So, the second I got home, I showered, changed and washed all of our clothing, all to see my Grampa and Gramma.

My Grampa is about 85 or so, and had a mind that I adored more than anyone’s. He could tell story like none other and only his daughter, my aunt, can achieve that status for me again. He wrote stories, often about his childhood, and kept us all enraptured with horse rides to school, ice box stories and homemade ice cream. Now, all I have left of those stories is his written word. He doesn’t have alzheimer’s, but has serious dementia from being blind for so long. He took blindness as a personal attack and never learned braille and hated books on tape so his mind deteriorated. So much so that now, they’ve learned his brain is actually pulling away from the stem. Ew. He’s even starting to forget that he’s blind – “Hey Bet’, could you go out and get me some of that Claritin, it says it’ll clear up my eyes, they are so foggy today”. He’s been blind for 15 years.

Today reminded me that he’s still there, he’s just a bit different, and still takes all the joys out of the world, but taken in through the eyes of an 84 y/o child.

Phew, who knew Firefox could be so demanding

I’ve been sitting here, 20 minutes after downloading a browser to replace my hated MS IE playing with it, also to get me logged into my beloved blog.  Hopefully not too many bugs in this.  If I could get away from Microsoft I would, including ‘Windows’ anything.  Linux, Unix, etc, would be gladly accepted except I love to play games on the internet (sudoku, crosswords, etc) and those don’t usually support them as they’re made for windows.  It’s a horrible cycle.

Well, I’m off to download Thunderfox, the email system.  Wish me luck that it doesn’t delete anything .

Finally, FINALLY!

I handed it in, yep, that first essay I blogged about like a month ago is finally just sent in. Oy, I hate essays. It just feels like babbling to me, even thought it’s fairly coherent, it’s just a bunch of ideas slapped together in some sort of order. It could be that I don’t even believe what I wrote, but if I’m going to get any mark in this course, I have to make this what s/he wants to read. Hopefully the marker is in a light mood because it’s not a topic that has a research-able answer, it’s critical thinking, which I hate to think, it’s highly overrated .

I just got in trouble from a FRIEND!

*snicker* she’ll crack up reading this. I’ve been bitching and moaning about not being a good friend. I was so down about it, I really was. Then, this morning, I got a pm from a great friend who told me basically to shut up dummy, you’re wrong *snicker*.

She pointed out that I’m the kind of person who would drop everything for a person in need, and it’s true. She pointed out that I’m always there for people, and it’s true. I have a huge heart that I give freely, but my problem is I hate the phone. Yes, it’s true, there is a female in this universe who hates the phone, so I never call people. I email, or IM, that’s it. Hell, that’s even how I communicate with dh, I get annoyed when he calls me from work.

There it is, I don’t suck as a friend, thank my friend for pointing it out for me.